Love Me Back To Life: Losing someone doesn't mean you have to lose yourself. by HMD & Olga Carries

Author:HMD & Olga Carries [Carries, Olga]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2015-05-29T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 16 – Heart Strings

I rub my eyes to help rid the tired from them. I'm getting up to meet with Grace. She asked me to join her and I can't ever say no to her. I don't think I ever will. It's still dark out and I tiredly get dressed, slipping on a pair of sweatpants and a light sweater for the brisk morning air. My phone goes off and it's Grace is letting me know she's on her way.

I quickly go through my routine and quietly make my way downstairs. It's too early even for my mother to be up. Or so I thought. I reach the bottom step and see the kitchen light is on. I shake my head and walk inside the room.

"Mom what are you doing up it's four thirty in the morning."

"Couldn't sleep." She says quietly and I try my best to read her. She's blowing on her hot chocolate and I grab a stool at the island. I scratch my forehead and run my hand down my face.

“I love you mom."

She smiles as she holds the cup up to her mouth. She mumbles an "I know." I'm brought back to several weeks prior and my discussion with my little brother.

I remember how he told me she cries herself to sleep sometimes. How she lingers in my room, praying for my safety, for my return. I sigh and look at the woman who's given me everything and I realize that my theory of 'at arm’s length' can't and won't work.

"Where you headed off to so early in the morning?"

"Grace is picking me up to watch the sunrise." I answer easily and I think the fact that I don't put up a fight catches her off guard. I further the conversation and discuss the gift I recently bought for Grace. My mother smiles as I give her a full on description of the small gesture in response to Grace's insurmountable affection.

She leans on the counter and giggles at the small jokes that I'm making. I raise my brows as she stifles a yawn and I stand up, walking to the other side of the counter. I take the cup from her hands and slide it away from her. Nodding my head in the direction of the stairs, I gently order my mother to go to bed.

I pull her in for a hug and her grip tightens. Usually I'd make a joke about how she's squeezing the air of me but I relent; squeezing just as tight. She gives me a kiss on the cheek and I watch her leave the kitchen. The timing is perfect as I feel my phone buzz and see that Grace is waiting outside for me. I turn the light off as I leave the kitchen and blindly make my way towards the front door. I grab the small gift bag before I head out of the house, quietly closing the door behind me.

I turn my face away from the bright headlights that beam up the driveway.

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